• I really want to take the train into Boston once the weather starts being consistently beautiful and warm and bright. That city really depresses me on rainy, miserable days. It makes me think of the buildings as paper mache, soaked and soggy with the ink running into the streets.
• When I drove in for Comic Con with Keith, there was a protest/walk/whathaveyou about the conflicts in Syria and Libya. The people looked so hopeful and fierce. I stopped and started crying because it struck my heart so hard, and I felt this great need to find what it is I really believe in, and rally behind it. My heart is so feeble and quiet, so lazy and complacent. I take too much for granted.
• I have a massive headache that just won’t quit. These are usually referred to as ‘tumor-aches’. Yknow, cos I have a tumor. In my brain. Driving me slowly mad. ( I swear this is the truth! One day you will all see. ONE DAY.)
• Dammit, all I wanna do is fuck. Why isn’t this happening.
• Precisely 24 hours before I’m due in for work as a night server, I am overcome by such intense dread that I find myself nearly incapable of enjoying anything.
• I have a killer rack. I’ve decided I ought to quit being so damn self-deprecating all the time, so I’m trying to figure out what it is I honestly like about myself and get to the point where I can confidently say it aloud. I HAVE AWESOME TITS. THANKS.
• Red string around my wrist makes me think of you.
• All I can think about is tits now.
• TITS!
• TITS!
• TITS!
• I think I’m gonna make myself another cup of coffee and watch some Hayao Miyazaki films.
• …tits.

TOM, I HAVE WORK TO DO, STOP DISTRACTING ME WITH YOUR BEAUTY & TALENT.

• his cute little ducktail hair
• i usually hate v-necks but oooh
• boy behind a piano = intstant swoon
• he has really nice hair
• ring!
• the weird angle of his legs
• shoes! jacket!
• he’s at a goddamn school reunion, how cute is that
• i wanna be friends with him so badly!

I haven’t seen all of them, but I know it’s a good list because Amelie, Pan’s Labyrinth, Let the Right One In, etc.

The Host was fucking ridiculous though, I don’t get why it’s on the list. My friend and I cracked jokes the whole time.

• Cold Tater Tots
• Wet denim
• Washing dishes with peanut butter on them
• Being damp
• Youtube comments
• Plastic packaging that is impossible to open

EDIT: WHEN CDs/DVDs AREN’T PUT IN THEIR PROPER CASES, I WANT TO PLAY SOME GODDAMN NEED FOR SPEED BUT INSTEAD I GET FUCKING ELMO’S WORLD WHAT IS THIS SHIT. YOU CALL YOURSELF A MAN, BROTHER?

I was going to make one of things that make me happy, but partway through realized it for the fruitless endeaver that it was. Instead, a list of things that make me feel like a human being:

• Catcher in the Rye
• Poetry by Pablo Neruda
• “Mad Girl’s Love Song” by Sylvia Plath
• Sleeping on the floor
• Classical music
• Swimming in the ocean until the salt burns my skin and makes me feel brand new
• Conor Oberst’s music
• Laughing endlessly
• Sadness
• Cemeteries (especially when the weather is nice)
• When people confide in me and tell me their feelings
• Cigarettes
• When I’m dizzy sweating and sick on the bathroom floor
• Shakespeare’s sonnets
• The moment of revelation during a particularly good film (or, occasionally, t.v. episode, i.e. the Cassie episode in the first series of Skins)
• Cities
• Singing alone in my room
• When I’m very afraid or very lonely
• After waking up from a lovely dream
• After waking up from a nightmare